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Archive for July, 2007

Next Time Let Me Help

Woof.

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Tuesday Ink

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West Side Story
A few weeks ago I was browsing the stacks at the Phoenix Public Library and ran across the soundtrack to this American musical classic. It’s been probably ten years since I last listened to it and since I was itching to hear something “new” come out of my CD player, I checked [...]

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Who among us that works with these Spawn-of-Satan things every day and has fought the urge to throw them off a nearby roof does not take a little smug satisfaction in seeing this? I know I do!

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Where is your mobile phone? Kitchen
Your relationship? What?
Your hair? Hahaha
Work? Sucks
Favorite color? Teal
Favorite thing? Camera
Last night’s dream? Dennis
Favorite drink? Mocha Frappuccino (Okay, that’s two words. Shoot me.)
Dream car? Driving it.
The room you’re in? Bedroom
Your shoes? Sneakers
What do you fear? Theocratic Fascism
What do you want to [...]

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Because if this is what’s considered sexy today, I don’t ever want to be sexy. (Nevermind the queen with the drinks in the foreground…looks like the old saying, “Cocktail in one hand, cigarette in the other, and nothing in between,” still holds true after all these years.)

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WTF?
Dear Sir,
Thank you for contacting The Home Depot Customer Care.
We appreciate you taking the time to forward your concerns regarding The Home Depot’s sponsorship of Bill O’ Reilly’s show on FOX.
The Home Depot has a strong passion for being environmentally responsible both in the Company’s operating principles and in responsible retailing through our industry-leading Eco [...]

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I’ll bet he and Joe ended up back at Buck’s place and got nekkid. With the squirrel watching, of course.

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In 6 minutes.

Can we impeach this whole fucking administration NOW?

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It’s All Our Fault

Because accepting personal responsibility for anything in your own life these days is so last century.

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As you know from previous posts, I’m a pretty regular customer at Homo Home Depot. But when I discovered today that they’re big sponsors on Bill “Loofa” O’Reilly’s show, it was definitely time for me to pull the plug on that.
This is the letter I just sent their corporate headquarters:
I will no longer be [...]

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Thursday Stubble

Paul Rudd. Very few guys can do stubble like Mr. Rudd. Woof.

Anything, anywhere, any time, Paul. Call me.

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